Description
Title: The Polite Troll: Sniff First, Smash Later – A Mostly Civil Manual for the Socially Aspiring Brute
Author: Professor S. T. Punk
Format: Paperback / Digital
Product Description:
Ever wondered if a troll could attend a wedding without accidentally redecorating the venue with a guest or two? Or if a swamp-dwelling brute could greet friends without inducing immediate panic? The Polite Troll is your definitive guide to achieving social decency without sacrificing trollish charm—or claws.
Packed with irreverent humor, step-by-step survival tips, and practical advice (for trolls who can read… and humans who just enjoy laughing at them), this manual covers everything from personal grooming to etiquette, party attendance, and even rudimentary diplomacy. With Professor S. T. Punk as your guide—seasoned survivor of six troll banquets and multiple mud duels—learn how to:
Scrub and style without scaring infants (too much).
Speak words that don’t start a brawl.
Eat without unintentionally redecorating your surroundings.
Dress to impress without distressing your neighbors.
Invite guests and travel safely, troll-style.
Illustrated with vivid, tongue-in-cheek instructions (pictures sold separately), appendices include translations of trollish grunts, fancy gestures that won’t end in screaming, and a checklist to ensure you’re “polite enough” for society.
Whether you’re a troll striving for civility or a human seeking the most entertaining etiquette guide ever, The Polite Troll is your companion to survival, style, and socialization—one cautious sniff at a time.
Features:
Foreword by Professor S. T. Punk, veteran of troll culture.
Eight chapters of irreverent, practical troll advice.
Handy appendices translating grunts, gestures, and social cues.
Emergency tips for last-minute appearances, unexpected parties, and spontaneous human encounters.
Perfect gift for fantasy lovers, humor readers, or anyone with a soft spot for misunderstood monsters.
Page Count: 32
Audience: Fantasy fans, humor enthusiasts, tabletop RPG players, troll aspirants.
