Description
Chats with a Corpse
Volume I: Official Record of Post-Mortem Chats Filed Under the “Moderately Important but Mostly Entertaining” Tier
Step into the afterlife’s least efficient call center.
Chats with a Corpse is your all-access pass to the unfiltered final words, grievances, and bizarre life stories of the recently departed—lovingly transcribed by the Soul Hold™ Automated Corpse Liaison System.
Inside, you’ll meet Oscar the squirrel, a career road-hazard performer with a flair for pirouettes; Puffy the gerbil, whose last snack sparked an electrical incident; and Tinker Bell the cat, who insists at least four of her nine deaths were “clerical errors.” These aren’t solemn obituaries—they’re candid, absurd, and occasionally petty afterlife interviews.
With deadpan efficiency and a sprinkling of bureaucratic ineptitude, Soul Hold™ handles every case, whether it involves vehicular lettuce collisions, posthumous workplace grievances, or disputes over acorn wreath budgets.
Whether you’re here for the morbid curiosity, the sharp humor, or the anthropomorphic drama, Chats with a Corpse delivers the ultimate reminder that death might be inevitable—but it doesn’t have to be dignified.
📂 Filed Contents Include:
Vehicular ballet gone wrong
Workplace hazard pay disputes
Misunderstood feline fatalities
Squirrel-sized monument requests
And exactly zero snacks for callers
Empathetic. Efficient. Eternal.
